You can KNOW that you are doing what God has called you to do.
“When there is no clear prophetic vision, people quickly wander astray. But when you follow the revelation of the Word, heaven’s bliss fills your soul.” Proverbs 29:18 TPT
If I had a dollar for every client I’ve worked with who expressed discontent at their life paths and ultimately discovered what they were doing was due to someone else’s pressure or expectation— let’s just say, I could counsel for free ;)
There is absolutely a difference between being good at something and making a career out of it, or falling in line with the family’s vocational tradition, versus actually living out your calling and the divine vision that God has given you. Now truthfully, and thankfully, there is a LOT of available material that already exists in video, volumes of books and probably hundreds of sermons on finding your calling. So I’m not here to simply repeat existing content. I’m adding the angle of a therapist - asking you to consider: is your unrest, depression, work or social anxiety, sleeplessness, confidence issues etc. in any way connected to the possibility that you’re simply not rightly placed ?
I remember realizing counseling was my thing - before I knew that’s what it was called. I could look over my history as a kid and remember sitting my peers down in a circle at age 8- calling a “shedding” meeting where everyone shared something that had hurt their feelings that week or offended them by another one of us in the friend group. We all took a turn and said our piece (don’t ask me how I somehow ended up with a sizable group of 3rd graders willing to go along with my idea— weekly — during our lunch break/recess…) and then we essentially hugged it out and resumed the kickball game or whatever was happening. Yep- this was always going to be me. I couldn’t go anywhere without strangers telling me their business - no matter their age or mine for that matter! This career chose me- I didn’t choose it. No amount of graduate school courses would best prepare me for this life’s work -although helpful - it’s truly been the work of the Holy Spirit that has given me the insight and wisdom to address things I’ve never even experienced.
Now- here you are. Hating your job. Dreading Mondays. Pep talking your way through the day, dreaming about some other life where you’re painting, gardening, singing, teaching, cooking elaborate meals from scratch, nursing sick animals or decorating celebrity homes— the thing you REALLY want to do. Or…. Maybe you’re the lead pastor at your church - dreaming about selling real estate. Or you’re the real estate agent who keeps leading people to Jesus and laying hands on folks instead of closing the sale. Whichever position you find yourself in, are you answering your REAL call? It’s important to address that inner angst - that disconnect- and spend some time with Jesus and take a trip down memory lane. What did you do naturally as a kid ? What did you lean towards in your free time, with no one's guidance or prompting ? What would you be doing if you didn’t hear your mom, dad, professors or first boss’ voice saying you couldn’t or shouldn’t? The answer is in you - because you were born as an answer to a question- a need - in this world. Don’t stop until you find it— and watch the inner storm within you begin to quiet as you align yourself with your true purpose. Trust me it makes ALL the difference.
Let’s also chat quickly about the PK’s (pastors kids) who are being groomed to believe that by virtue of being born to a pastor, and his/her parent a pastor before them, that this must be the path they’re headed towards also. Nonsense! I don’t believe in inherited callings - they are individual and unique. Stepping into a pastoral role isn’t like just learning the family carpentry trade. We all have our own aptitudes, attitudes, strengths and weaknesses. To hand something as serious and impactful as a pastoral ministry over to your children simply because they share your last name is ridiculous and unwise. They too must be specifically called and led to that profession. So whether you’re the pastor trying to force your square peg son or daughter into the round hole of ministry life or you’re the square peg son or daughter that’s feeling the pressure while your dreams and desires lie elsewhere- I encourage both of you to LET GO and LET GOD. Seek HIM about who you’re meant to be and watch your own true skills surface and point you in the right direction.
Now quick addition for the naysayers and the realists who, rightfully so, are like “Yea Sheri - just drop my $100k sure thing accounting job to become the golf instructor I’ve always dreamed of — and my wife and kids will totally understand — not to mention my bills!” I didn’t say to stop, drop and roll out of your career tomorrow at my bidding. I simply invite you to not rule out your true self and ask the Lord for His direction on how to make room for what you love — and see what avenues may have been in front of you all along - you just assumed it was too late or too impossible.
So dare to dream and imagine again. Get back into a curious conversation with your Maker about your true purpose for existing. You just never ever know what you’ll discover!
Jeremiah 29:11 & Ephesians 2:10 - read with fresh eyes.